Graduation tomorrow… too bittersweet

I think I’m starting to grasp the fact that this is the end………. wait no, not really. I can’t really understand that this is happening… so much disbelief right now. I wish I had cherished friends and good times more these past few months, even though in the moment I felt like I had. It’s hard to believe that these people who collectively make up my world will only be memories in the future. High school will only be a memory… After four years, I will never be in the same setting with the same people ever again… what do I make of this?

I know the reality is that I must and will let go of these four years. But I guess I’m just sad. Sad that I can’t stay in this home and this comfort zone forever, sad that I’ll lose touch with some people who currently mean a significant amount to me, sad that the only traces of others that I will have will be how they affected me, sad that I can’t return to those blissful moments of happiness spent with people who make my heart so full! I do hope, however, that I look back on high school in the future and smile with a sense of pride and familiarity, the acknowledgment that the laughs, tears, hugs, fights, thrills, stress, joy, confusion, concerts, late-night talks, food, dancing, hearts, accomplishments, struggles, and everything else in between defined a critical period in my life in which I somehow, in four years that now seem like a flash of light, seemingly magically transformed from a know-it-all, self-confident on the inside and passive on the outside fresh out of 8th grade freshman to an 18 year old who is striving to greet others with a smile free of judgment, who has had ideals shattered, who bubbles with inexplicable love for the most random things, and who introspects to find and worry that she knows nothing about life. 

I must remember to keep my head on my shoulders, to surround myself with people whom I trust and admire and whose opinions and values I trust and admire, to interact with those who disagree, to remind myself of the core qualities and beliefs that make me the me I want to be. I’m not ready for this, but let’s do it anyway. Thank you and goodbye, Class of 2012. So much love and gratitude <3

Lying on the bed listenin to the waves crash onto the shore… nbd. <3 Laguna

=)

escapisttendency:

I am leaving at 5:45 AM for Laguna Beach tomorrow.

Everything still has this hazy, third-person feel to it, because I still don’t think I’ve fully processed that it’s my turn now.

I’m not leaving at 5:45 AM tomorrow, but these are my sentiments exactly.

(via miraculouslyunlame)

priscirrrrraohyoung:

huochangshan:

college map! (Taken with instagram)

Haha and of course, everybody rushes to get the newspaper to see this.. Another great turnout! Proud of them seniors (:

This is real… =)

WHEN YOU’RE WATCHING HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL

gottabeastringplayer:

AND LIKE SEVEN OF THE CHARACTERS GET “SCHOLARSHIPS TO JUILLIARD”

(by andsotodark)

Matthew Gray Gubler’s reasons to stay alive

(Source: gublerheaven, via escapisttendency)

3.Homecoming- what it meant to you and your memories of it

It’s so hard to think about homecoming and remember what it felt like, as there are less than two weeks until summer hahah. Buttttt I know that homecoming was always really, really exciting for me! It was one of the things that just screamed HIGH SCHOOL because the media said so. Freshman year, it was fun just because it was all new. Starting sophomore year, our class began to step it up, and since then, homecoming was the time when most of us actually came together. The whole week, I’d basically wear my FUCK YEAH 2012 attitude, and it was just a feel-good, I-LOVE-EVERYONE, and I’m-on-top-of-the-world time =) The balloon slides from junior year, BEAST, our class being awesome, winning tug-of-war BOTH years, and just everything being awesome =) good times, good times.

WHEN SOMEONE IS TALKING ABOUT HOW FUN REHEARSAL IS

gottabeastringplayer:

hahahhah

: in most situations you don’t have to be sad, i realize, if you address... →

cerebellumagic:

in most situations you don’t have to be sad, i realize, if you address the things that upset you as soon as they upset you. if you are having a conversation with someone and you find them being very distant or fake or contradictory, who is to say that you are not allowed to ask them these…

(via fizajihan)

2. First memory of high school

I remember matriculation of freshman year… walking onto campus in my DENIM dress hahaha… (yes, it is possible!). I remember seeing Joanna, whom I had shadowed in eighth grade, and saying hi to her and feeling okay that I knew someone! Then I tried looking for Jess and Kathy and Tina… That day was exciting yet intimidating

I also remember walking into orchestra the next morning, wearing my light pink abercrombie shirt and awkward shoes hahahha. I was incredibly quiet and sat next to Vivian Huang near the middle of the cello section. I remember watching Julia, Sonya, Brittany, Carissa, and Elaine being friends and wishing that I could be like that as well! 

To think of how things have changed…. =)